So Many Men

I've been a bit of a slut the past few days, snuggling up every night on the couch with two of the tastiest men I know. I have yet to meet a man on a dating site who can come close to satisfying my basest urges the way Ben and Jerry can.

Yesterday, as I slurped contentedly on a delectable mix of flavors, message alerts from from the Jewish dating site were popping up on my Blackberry faster than I could lick up the stray drops. I had inadvertently failed to log off after checking out the last bunch, and activity tends to pick up when they see you are online. It's too hard to access them on my little smart phone, though, and there was no way I was going to risk missing out on one bite of Ben or Jerry to leave the room and check out the eligible bachelors in hot pursuit on a Friday night.

Actually, I kind of forgot about all the cyber suitors, being so wrapped up in the comforting icy embrace of the hunks from Vermont and all, and went to bed still basking in the glow of yet another evening with my two best guys. Naturally, when you spend half the day alternating between slurps of ice cream and drawn out naps on the couch, you tend to be wide awake in the middle of the night, so I decided to see if the "real" man of my dreams had tried to reach me.

Among others, there were flirty little emails from an adorable thirty-seven year old, a hot looking forty-three year old from New York (good to keep in mind for my next visit), a guy my age from Tel Aviv who, I could tell, has never seen a stick of deodorant, another guy my age who emails me every night and hasn't yet figured out my lack of response is not accidental, and two guys who only wanted to know if I write about men in my blog. "Only if they're assholes," I replied. I'm guessing I can scratch the two of them off my list.

I didn't respond to anyone else, although I was tempted to pursue an exchange with the guy who has chosen Jamesbond as his screen name. It was tough, but I resisted the urge. Which leaves me in a bit of a quandary. I am officially out of Ben and Jerry's, having polished off the last of the four pints I purchased earlier in the week. And, since I'm out anyway, I made a vow to myself that I would not spend tonight, Saturday night, sitting on the couch eating ice cream.

I suppose I'll just sort of fail to log off the dating site, and hope for the best when I return home from work this afternoon. Otherwise -- well, promises are made to be broken. It's off to the grocery store.