After all, what's a little botulism when it can save you a few trips to the bathroom. And if it ends up smoothing out a few wrinkles, well, that's just a little extra bang for your buck. I'm considering going in for a little bladder touch up as I venture back out into the work force. Heck, my daughter just got out there and she has to work side by side every day with a former Miss Virginia. A real one. Next to me, everybody is going to look like a friggin former Miss Virginia. Life is demoralizing enough these days.
I'm so excited about this new procedure I'm going to ask the vet if it's available for dogs. Manny has a bit of an overactive bladder these days; he prefers to simply pee in the house rather than wait for me to let him out. And, well, you've all seen the pictures. A little wrinkle treatment might do him a world of good, lift his spirits a bit. I can only imagine what it feels like to live in a neighborhood full of schnoodles and shihpoos and maltipoos and labradoodles and all those other designer mutts concocted in puppy labs. (Okay, truth be told, Manny was conceived in a petri dish as well, but I think Dr. Frankenstein was on call that day.)
Face it. The pressure to look good crosses species lines. You'd think with the ever increasing popularity of cosmetic surgery Manny and I wouldn't need an excuse to go in for a little wrinkle plumping. But we'll never hear the end of it from those who know us best.
So we'll just flaunt our Depends, and once we're certain we've aired our cases for excessive urination, it's off to the bladder specialist to tighten things up a bit.
No comments:
Post a Comment