Gym Dandy

Apparently, if you get an excused absence from gym at the high school -- which seems reasonable if you've been diagnosed with mono and a sinus infection -- it means sure, you don't have to be here, but you're getting a D+. Really more of an acknowledged absence, I think.

The detailed message from the gym teacher outlining exactly how gym grades are calculated -- participation is huge, and when you're not there, for whatever reason, you are not participating -- probably should have cleared everything up for me, but I have to admit I still don't get it. Maybe it's my old fashioned math skills, or maybe it's some problem I have with basic vocabulary. "Excused" is obviously a word of many nuances.

Anyway, the very helpful gym teacher suggested that my daughter could bring her grade up, maybe to a C, if she pops over to the gym every day during finals week and puts in some time on an exercise bike. Hmm, maybe if she brings her heart rate up above two hundred she can get some extra credit, even eke out a B-. Whatever. It's all about the transcript, and Harvard isn't taking a kid who barely passes gym. Wait, Harvard probably isn't taking her anyway, so who cares?

Up here in deep dark suburbia, we do care, a lot, and we pay steep property taxes for top notch public education. And, for a lot of folks, whatever's left in the piggy bank goes to tutors. If you try to find a seat in the local Starbucks during finals, good luck with that. The tutors stake their claims early, setting up shop at every available table and couch as they receive the endless stream of students looking to enhance their grades I mean education. If all the pennies in my piggy bank weren't already spoken for (trailers aren't cheap), I'd be out there searching for a gym tutor. Someone who can explain to my daughter (and me, frankly) how to be there when you just can't be there.

I know I shouldn't be working up a sweat about all this, but what kind of parent would I be if I didn't do everything I could to advocate for my child. Then again, I've gotten pretty good at recognizing a lost cause when I see one, so I'm ripping up the court papers and hoping a little extra cardio between finals will be one of those invaluable learning experiences you just can't get when you're sitting home fighting what feels like the plague. At the very least, maybe she'll get that C.