Wednesday, April 6, 2016

Hold the Knishes


A round of cheese curds on Bernie today.

The Kool-Aid's been flowing freely on both sides this election season, but the orange stuff has been the flavor of the month for so long that nobody's paid much attention to the rest of the slop. I admit it, I'm a little thirsty for some Trump tweets this morning. The Trojan Horse reference was a bit too high brow for my taste, though I take comfort knowing that Don assumes it was a condom reference. 

As a born and bred Brooklynite, I get Bernie, at least to the extent that he could be anybody's uncle at your average Brooklyn holiday table. We Brooklynites are all like Bernie, in the sense that we hold fast to our abrasive accents no matter how many years we spend living elsewhere, and when we talk we don't really pull any punches. But there are two things people should know about Brooklynites. First, even though we can sound illiterate -- especially when we get excited -- we're pretty smart. Second, we are not representative of the rest of New York State, so what Brooklyn thinks probably does not matter all that much when we're talking about picking the next leader of the free world. 

In fact, what Brooklyn thinks does not matter at all in most parts of the country. While everyone is cracking open the Manischewitz a couple of weeks early, the really scary Kool-aid is being poured in places far, far away. Like Mississippi. Quote of the day: "People of faith have rights, too." A real life governor said this, with a straight (and definitely not gay) face. I suppose he makes a good point. People of faith should have rights. I have a feeling the Mississippi gov defines "people" differently from the way I do. Kind of like the Nazis did. Or fans of slavery. 

Bernie seems nice. The governor of Mississippi does not. He seems downright scary, as do some of the folks who might actually run for President on the Republican side of the aisle. Maybe that's just the Brooklyn in me, wondering why the most important talking point in an election is an assurance that you truly believe a woman is not the person who should decide what to do with her own body. This, in a world where there are a lot of people drinking very dark Kool-Aid and committed to the idea of mass murder and destruction of all that is good in the world. 

This morning, though, everyone is finally paying attention to Bernie after he proved that he is definitely not chopped liver, er, bratwurst. And I say good for Bernie, whose Jewish mother can finally rest in peace knowing that, even though her son never became a doctor, he's making a credible run for POTUS -- surely the next best thing. Mazel tov Bernie, enjoy the moment, before reality sets in. Hold the cheese curds; pass the gefilte fish.


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