Status Quo

My mom called yesterday to remind me her phone is working. Over fifty years as a Jewish mother, and that's the best she could come up with to make me feel like shit?

I admit, I've been a bit remiss about staying in touch. I didn't even realize her email was down (which is why, allegedly, she called to remind me about the phone). I know she's worried, I'm a mom, I get it. But I have nothing good to report -- nothing she'd be interest in hearing about anyway -- and it's just not my habit to call people to say "hey."

Shame on me. I should know better. I am well acquainted with the cheap little thrill that goes along with a quick text or call from one of my kids, even if it's only just to say "hey." (That is, after I get over the initial panic, assuming as I always do that something must be wrong.) Kind of ironic, since I never contact my own mom when something is wrong. Which is why, these days, communication -- on my end -- leaves a lot to be desired.

It's not that anything in particular is wrong. It's just that things have not yet become right. I remain in limbo, at the mercy of folks who are simply not as motivated to be done with my divorce as I am. In fairness (to me), I am an equal opportunity uncommunicative bitch; I avoid lots of conversations, since most folks I know will ask me what the status of my divorce is, and, frankly, I don't feel like discussing it.

My daughter explained to me, this morning, that everyone in her life pretty much knows everything about everybody the moment it happens. The Facebook generation posts status reports as things happen -- break-ups, hook-ups, the eruption of a pesky new pimple, with up to the minute pictures to accompany all the breaking news. The inner circle, the outer circle, anybody who's ever heard your name -- and is therefore officially your "friend" -- knows what's going on in your personal life at any given time. A good thing? I don't know, but at least it saves everyone a few phone calls to the people who really matter.

I will try very hard to remember to call my mom today. I will suggest to her that she join Facebook and check my status for any changes. Or maybe check for a new profile picture; if my thumb is up, she'll know things are good.